Resolved

Ooooh, let's talk about our New Year's resolutions. A lot of folks figured out that we don't actually keep these so they don't participate or maybe they call it something else, but it can't hurt to take a peek at ourselves and what we might improve and have just a little hope that maybe this year we'll tweak things enough to think we've done something differently. Usually I think we all pick exercise more and eat better so let's just not count that one. What else?

This year I'm thinking of committing to two things: First, if you have included in your Facebook Basic Information section that you speak several languages, I intend to have you read and translate a short paragraph for me in each of those languages. There cannot possibly as many multi-lingual people as claim to be and I intend to investigate. Let's not start our friendship out with falsehoods.

Second, I'm thinking that this year I will commit to trusting my gut more. My favorite quote has been rolling around in my head for the last few weeks. It's this: "When someone shows you who they are, believe them." And let's add, because we never learn, "THE FIRST TIME" to the end of it.

Good Lord, how many exasperating situations in my life could I have avoided if I had only listened to my instincts about people? Have you ever read Gavin DeBecker's book The Gift of Fear?
You should. One of the interesting points he makes is that humans are the ONLY animals that will actually talk themselves out of trusting their instincts. He mentions how we will actually get in the elevator with the guy that gives us the creeps- A SOUNDPROOF STEEL BOX! - because we don't trust our very protective instincts.

I'm not really focusing on physical danger, though. I'm thinking more about listening to our guts in our relationships, both new and old. Imagine the situations we could avoid if we listened to the first, second or third red flag? How many lopsided or even toxic relationships would I avoid if I only LISTENED? AND IT'S FREE. And mostly dead-on right too so this should be easy, right?

I swore when I had my daughter that above all I wouldn't undermine her gut instincts. What better way to prepare her path in the world? If she has a read on a situation, I'm not going to be the person to tell her she shouldn't feel a certain way. I was proud when she told me from under the table at Chuck E. Cheese at age 5 that there was just something about a man in a mouse suit she didn't feel good about. I just handed her a drink under there because, really, I'm not sure any of us should feel good about a man in a mouse suit. She's got more confidence to articulate her gut than I do, but we ALL have a gut reaction.

So, there you go. This year, I'm working on valuing my instincts and outing Facebook fraud. 2011 is so dead to me.